What do you do if someone you love is doing something you know is wrong?

We can talk for ages about the wrongs of celebrities and people we don’t know. If we are an anonymous voice among the many, we feel free to say whatever we wish, be it helpful or hurtful. Yet, when it comes to our own loved ones, our friends and family, it becomes taboo to say anything at all.

We shut our mouths and withhold our opinions to “keep the peace.” We don’t want to cause a problem or make someone feel bad.

The fact is, that by not saying anything, you do everyone, including yourself, a disservice. You aren’t being honest with the people you care about most, and you aren’t being honest or true to yourself.

Nothing in this world has been changed by people that keep their mouths shut about things that they know and believe are wrong.


Is everyone going to like what you have to say? No, of course not. People in general are stubborn. Therefore, when you be true to yourself and say what is on your mind, your goal should not be to change them, but to inform them. You cannot control what others do with their lives.

The most important thing is, if you have something negative to say about what a person has done, it does not mean that you don’t care or that you don’t love them. It means the exact opposite. 

“I Would Rather Be Hated Than Loved With Conditions”

This is a great article that popped up  on my newsfeed, written by one of my favorite authors, Donald Miller. Fate strikes again, seeing as I have had this topic in my mind since late Sunday night, and he really hits the nail on the head.

Being truthful with people about what you believe, even if it is the exact opposite of what they believe means that you say your part, and if they keep on doing what they are doing, you love them anyway.

My favorite quote from this article is at the end:

“I will tell the truth to the best of my ability, I will not try to control, and there is nothing anybody can do to get me to stop loving them.”

This is exactly what has been going through my mind. Mr. Miller took the words right out of my mouth. I want to live my life in a way that is true to who I am and what I believe. If I feel a loved one has done or is doing wrong, I won’t keep my mouth shut. They can take what I say how they will, but whatever they decide to do will not have any effect on if I love them or not.

Let’s all stop this taboo. Let’s be honest with the people we love and not hide our feelings. Everyone deserves the truth from the people that they love most. No one is able to agree on everything, but many times there are things that need to be said that are hidden away. What you have to say could make them mad, yes, or it could be the stone that causes the ripple effect to help change things for the better. You will never know if you don’t speak up.